We had our last Monastic Mondays post last week. I don’t know about you, but I haven’t seen Abba Monday since. I keep meaning to get around to his mountain, but that would mean walking uphill and then just sitting around while he gave me that look and you know how it goes. So I feel a little guilty neglecting the guy (not sure why–he was kind of a jerk) and thought I would collect all of his adventures here.
1. Abba a Word
The start of the series with a little primer on the origins of the monastic movement and the Sayings of the Desert Fathers and Mothers.
Wherein Br. Monday does something he shouldn’t.
Br. Monday still doesn’t like talking about this.
Wherein Br. Monday gets a free brick!
Wait for the exciting sequel: If You Give a Hermit a H…oh never mind.
Wherein Br. Monday learns the true meaning of education.
Wherein Br. Monday wishes he had chosen a different life.
If you forget anything from this list — don’t worry! — Prof. John will fill you in.
In Br. Monday’s absence, we learned how a modern monk met the poet Czeslaw Milosz.
Wherein Abba Moses becomes Br. Monday’s favorite by convincing the other abbas to leave him alone.
Wherein Abba Pambo and Abba Giles have a disagreement.
It has to be a miracle that there haven’t been more Name of the Rose-style homicides in monasteries…
Br. Monday still doesn’t get the joke, and I’m not sure I do either.
Why not both?
Let’s just say he wouldn’t mind taking the “labora” out of “ora et labora.”
Br. Monday still doesn’t get why he was the only one who ran.
Br. Monday’s first retreat conference wherein he learns:
We are all alive together and bound into varying constellations by the live numbers of the proportions through which we see and touch each thing and the next.
18. First Love
Wherein Br. Monday learns a very important lesson about lying and matches.
Br. Monday didn’t learn anything here.
20. Lady’s Man
Let’s just face it–every monk is one of these.
21. False Impression
Think you understand other parts of the world? So does Br. Monday…
And he did just that, even though every day is a holiday for Br. Monday. Seriously, all he does is stand there with that look on his face whenever I ask him to help out with something.
Out here in the desert, the Abba’s are always getting stuffy, churchy questions. Be the first to ask the Abba what he thinks about the last season of Arrested Development or if he’s going to wear his robes to The Force Awakens premier.
It is good that you are here. It is good that you are here. And most importantly: It is good that you are here.
Wherein I offend Br. Monday deeply. No, I won’t apologize.
Wherein we discover that Br. Monday and the Provincial have run off.
Abba Derrida has something to teach us about hospitality.
Gold give us, God forgive us,
And from all woes relieve us;
That we the treasure
May reap of pleasure,
And shun whate’er is grievous,
Gold give us, God forgive us.
“If I am I because I am I, and you are you because you are you, then I am I, and you are you. But if I am I because you are you, and you are you because I am I, then I am not I, and you are not you.”
This is what happens when you take away a monk’s TV.